I don't know what sorts of bizarre perversions or old traditions are practiced in
London, city of your birth. However, here in London, we do not engage in such
deep and misguided body modifications as you have seen fit to do to yourself.
While I admit that Prince Alberts, nipple piercing, and labrets all have a certain
venerable mystique, I do not approve of your alteration of your major histocompatibility
complex to resemble a penguin in lust. This modification is inducing great distress in my
sinuses as I seem to be allergic to it. If you do not leave, I will have you forcibly ejected
from the room by some buff physics students. If you do not reverse or negate
this modification, I will have you removed from the registration for this class, and if
you persist in such insanity, I will have you removed from this school.